Humorous quotes – Business

"A criminal is a person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation." – Howard Scott

"I’m spending a year dead for tax reasons!" – Douglas Adams

"The definition of a consultant: Someone who borrows your watch, tells you the time, and then charges you for the privilege." anonymous

"The first rule of business is: Do other men for they would do you!" – Charles Dickens

"In the business world an executive knows something about everything, a technician knows everything about something, and the telephonist knows everything!" – Harold Coffin

"Few great men would have got past personnel!" – Paul Goodman

"When I asked my accountant if anything could get me out of this mess I am now in, he thought for a long time and said ‘Yes, death would help!" – Robert Morley

"A lot of people become pessismists from financing optimists" – C T Jones

"We didn’t actually overspend our budget. The allocation simply fell short of our expenditure" – Keith Davis

"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do advertising them, then they wouldn’t have to advertise them!" – Will Rogers

"Today’s payslip has more deductions than a Sherlock Holmes novel" – Raymond Cvikota